Pregnancy and childbirth, pregnancy calendar, birth of the child, development of the child, health of children.

In development of the child psychologists and pediatrists allocate three stable periods: "infantile" - since a birth till one year, "the early childhood" - from a year to three, and "the preschool childhood" - from three years to seven. Each of these stages comes to the end with so-called crisis of development.

Crisis is a necessary and natural stage in a life of the child when changes in behaviour and development collect and there is a transition to qualitatively new stage. Each crisis is accompanied by occurrence of obstinacy, disobedience, whims which the kid extremely brightly shows. Thus, these crises also three: crisis of one year, crisis of three years and crisis of seven years. To bypass them it is not possible - through it there pass practically all children. But for one this transition occurs easier, for others it is accompanied by more serious, considerable behavioural displays. Parents are surprised, searching for the reasons of such sudden changes in behaviour of a daughter or the son. But these changes are natural, peculiar to all children at certain age, therefore them named "development crises".

So why they arise? First of all, because children have new requirements, and old forms of their satisfaction any more do not approach, sometimes even stir, constrain, and consequently cease to carry out the functions.

Let's talk about crisis of one year, about those major tasks which dare at this stage. In the end of the first year of a life the social situation of full merge of the child with the adult as though blows up from within. The kid starts to understand and differentiate: I the kid, and he am an adult, we - different. In it an essence of crisis of the first year of a life. At this age the child gets certain degree of independence: there are first words, there is a formation of skills of walking, actions with subjects develop. But the range of possibilities for an embodiment of it is still limited enough.

Here your kid has made the first step. The space of its existence has extended. Now he can independently travel on apartment and not only, means, there is a possibility to find set of very interesting things which simply demand perfect studying and eksperimentirovanija with them. But for some reason it appears, that mum can use all subjects on kitchen, and to the child - is not present. The daddy is allowed to work as much as necessary with tools, and to the son or a daughter besides forbid to take in hands nails or a hammer. Why? Children's curiosity, desire to get acquainted with everything, that meets around, is needs of nature of this age. And interdictions which the kid does not understand, cause in it the protest which is shown we cry, obstinacy, dissatisfaction, that is all that so surprises parents, and has received in psychology the "crisis" name.

Certainly, each child develops under especial "schedule" therefore the kid can undertake the first steps and in nine months, and in year and three months. And the first displays of crisis are often shown at various times. But is more often it occurs then when to the child year is executed.

What occurs to your kid during this period? Parents can notice occurrence in behaviour of native fumes of obstinacy, kapriznosti. Earlier obedient and quiet, during this period he starts to be capricious at the slightest pretext, and very often parents cannot understand, that has served as the reason of such "attack".

First of all, it is necessary to underline, that your kid already understands much and can, but he is not able to tell about the desires yet. The child all learns the world more actively. Earlier he was not able to go, its movement has been limited. Since then, when the kid has learnt to go, its world has extended and filled with set of things which "demand" attention to itself. The child travels on apartment and studies, as the plate on kitchen that is hidden in a case for footwear is arranged, also he aspires to take each subject in hands, to examine, twist, try "on a tooth". But suddenly from parents it is distributed it "is impossible". He at all does not understand the reasons of it. Therefore repeats attempt and cries, when the interdiction sounds once again. The child tries to express all means accessible to it the desires. The kid is not able to speak yet to express the dissatisfaction. And new attempts of knowledge of the world cause new interdictions.

So the will of the small person faces for the first time will of the adult. The child in a year wishes to operate itself, it any more does not accept position of a doll with which feed, swaddle, give toys when want, talk, when do not want - do not talk. He aspires to be independent, and to communicate at own will. Here again one more paradox - aspiration to dialogue is, and words to express all it, still is not present. Difficultly happens to understand, that wanted by the kid though he and tries to express own desires and requirements.

So crisis of the first year begins. It that becomes deeper, than more parents contradict desires of the kid. Whims of the child, actually, are an indicator of that the adult there has come time to change the behaviour and the relation to own child. Former stereotypes of dialogue any more do not work. And if your child wishes to seize hands a spoon while you feed him easier to yield to it this subject, and to yourself to take another and to continue stopped not on long process. It doesn't matter, if the kid is all is smeared by porridge, but you easy feed him, and after all simply will clean and will wash the child.

It is necessary for parents to understand, that there has come that moment when it is very important to give to the child of more independence. It is necessary to feel, that has come it is time to do something not for the kid, and together with it. Throughout the first half of the year of the second year of a life it is possible to learn it to use a spoon, there is a soup with bread, to drink from a cup, to remove a hat, stockings, and further and to put on, independently to wash, etc. If this stage will be passed, later, in 3-5 years the child simply will not want to be engaged in these already uninteresting things for it, especially he gets used, that mum dresses, washes, feeds.

It is necessary to be attentive to the first displays of children's independence: the child reaches for a spoon that is most, selects at mum a hat to dress, tries to put cubes one on another, and is very dissatisfied, when someone tries to help. If parents with understanding and patience concern these first displays of activity of the child in due course will be rewarded by independence of the kid, confidence, cheerfulness. Than is the things more, which adults allow the child, it is especially easy to insist on interdictions. And having taken care of that dangerous subjects were inaccessible to the kid, you can easy allow to investigate to it your house - all boxes, jashchichki, the bottom regiments. And as the nobility, probably, today's game of the son or a daughter with a pan in the future will turn to cook talent. Certainly, it is not necessary to encourage any desires of the child. Interdictions should be the families clever, accurate, unequivocal and co-ordinated between all adult members. If forbid something in the course of it the attention of the kid needs to be distracted simply on something another, and it is possible to offer clever alternative: it is forbidden to write on fatherly documents, but here there is a leaflet - here it to do it is allowed. But never it is impossible to play a knife (not to be wounded) or boots (they dirty) or expensive things (the alternative in the form of the old broken alarm clock can turn back tomorrow "dismantling" of new hours, after all the child simply does not realise a difference though already very well is able to draw analogies: these are hours if I can play them it is possible also all others).

If parents have shown enough step, patience and flexibility in the relation to the kid the first crisis stage in its development will come to the end and there will come quiet time. Certainly, it not on long. But while the child becomes again obedient, quiet. And, the kid became already more independent and is more adult, it can and is able already much more, than earlier.

We hope, that you have understood the major: your child even at this age is already the person, with the desires, feelings, emotions, is simple it is not able to express them yet. And if you give to more that time to try to understand the kid any crisis will pass faster, easier, with smaller emotional losses for both parties.